I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i just google imaged poop.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
