Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
Randomize
