I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
this girl is running around outside screaming, it's creaming on me! it's creaming on me. I totally have to find my video camera
the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I'm kinda hungover this morning and I need to wire money to my lawyer. So this is what adulthood feels like
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
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