What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Def slept AT the bar last night, wow that's a first!
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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