He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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