I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
Randomize
