So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
He probably smells like baby powder and sexual identity crisis.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Hows that studying goin for you?
I'm in my bathtub in a robe and jeans smoking a bowl and my hair is covered in olive oil
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Randomize
