My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
My apartment stinks of burning failure
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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