Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
He's trying to marry me, when is the appropriate time to tell him my real name and that Dallas is a completely fictitious slutty alter ego? I need the advice of someone with morals.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
