We're facebook friends in real life
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
He corrected me on my grammar when I came. Fuck English majors.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
'lets look at pictures of your friend's new baby' was probably the worst post-sex idea we've ever had
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
