Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
True strength comes from lack of pants
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize