is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
May God have mercy on my new vibrator.
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
All four of us managed to throw up in the same bathroom at different times during the night. I think we'll get along great living together.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
Nope if you can't be there for me emotionally, then my vagina can't be there for you physically. That's my rule.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Just text the random number in my iphone notes that was entered at 1am. Should be interesting.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
Randomize