I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
So called my VP's house on Sunday drunk and told him that if he didn't hire me for the new position I would skull fuck his wife. They asked me to go home today. Thanks again Vodka
you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.