I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
She tried to escape and she fell and hit the door. She's gunna freak when she wakes up with only half a tooth.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
the walk of shame isn't very shameful when your mom tells you she's proud of you.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
