? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
You ever fart so bad at work that you think about taking a sick day just to spare your coworkers from the savage olfactory beating they are about to receive?
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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