Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i just told a girl i would suck the alcohol out of a deoderant stick
ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
What the fuck is wrong with your family? Why do you have unfrosted pop tarts.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize