wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my balls were so many shades of blue last night I could have used them as paint and replicated the entirety of Picaso's blue period. The girl was an art major I feel like this metaphor is appropriate.
In local news "Man Stabbed With Golf Club" next person who tells me this is a safe place to live gets punched...
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize