I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
Hi, this is a test of the morning after apology broadcast system. If you're receiving this pre-recorded message there is a high probability I was a dickwad to you in the past 24 hours. You have my utmost and sincere apologies. Also if you have my wallet, house key, left converse, or lighter, give them/it back
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I'm good. Got my nipples pierced and threw my back out. 🙌
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
Randomize
