Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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