I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Randomize
