id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
can you call in chlamydia to work? like if the antibiotics they gave you for it are giving you the shits...
the towel caught on fire outside the hottub but we were all too stoned to care
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Turns out my GF and my FWB have a mutual friend. Yada yada yada, I need to crash on your couch
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