im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
im drinking this country out of the recession.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize