So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
im pretty sure i just dented her unborn child.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
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