I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
