i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
i was born a porn star she said
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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