Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
He kissed a someone with a penis
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
he kept doing his monologue, "if a vagina could talk."
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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