I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I think its a little fucked up she invited you to her wedding, are you going?
There is a lot of acid in my drugs right now
....ill put you down as a no then
Randomize
