even a "fuck you" would be nice at this point.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Well, I'm off to go seduce a gay man. In 10 years when I'm 300 pounds, sitting in a mumu surrounded by my 500 cats, remind me of this text. That way I can be like "ohhh THERE'S where I went wrong!!"
scream really loud. we think you crawled under the deck
It's like wanting to be a vampire vs being a vampire. You don't know the cock lust until it's infected you.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
