I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize