i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
He's afraid of heights. How do I know, you ask? Blowjob on his roof.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
