Plan B is the new Plan A
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
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