that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
You know when you blow me it's the softest, most amazing feeling ever. Like putting my dick in a silk bag filled with puppy ears.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
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