she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
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