And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
There is a guy dressed as Captain America in the theatre. I want to make out with him even though I have no idea what he looks like. Wish me luck, I'm going in.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
