erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
he ate me out on his front porch at dawn. i orgasmed when the sun began to rise. most romantic morning booty call ever.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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