youre lurking in front of me
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
I just got a voicemail from some strange woman with a Russian accent. Are you ok?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
