he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
I just used a beer funnel to put gas in my car
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
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