Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
I was trying to drink every time they said planned parenthood but my body isn't cut out for this.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize
