Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Easy for you to say! His first impression of you isn't the drunk girl in a turtle costume who got hit by a car!
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Randomize
