so you know how i got laid the other night? well a condom just came out of me and i dont know whether to be grossed out or happy
i am grossed the fuck out
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
