the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
Its like drunk me is Oprah except instead of a car everyone's award is seeing my boobs
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
But Keith is doing MDMA for New Years and he's 39.
Keith has a beautiful 20 year old girlfriend, a good job and a cute puppy. We can't all be Keith.
But I want to be Keith.
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Dude, I just turned down sexual favours because I need to study... What the fuck is wrong with me?
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