ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
you woke me up just to tell me that I was beautiful in every way possible. Then you proceeded to fall asleep with your mouth on my boob.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
If my bootycall doesn't bring over a Baconnator, I swear to fucking God, I'm not letting him in. The hunger is that real. Forget his Persian dick.
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
