I'm really into asian looking animals
i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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