Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Dad and I are shitfaced screaming at Canadians in Walmart. Life is good.
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I wish I knew the extent of my injuries before I climbed over the fence. Might have avoided the need to purchase a cupholder for my wheelchair.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
