Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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