We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
you made them have somersault races with you thru the lobby..
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He sent me a snap chat of his naked torso with cookies over his nipples. Like.... that does not make me want you homeboy.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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