and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
He told me he was a psychology major, and I responded by asking him where he hid his vagina.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
just realized we fucked to the ultimate disney playlist last night. hakuna matata.
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Randomize
