we're blogging at a bar
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I love having hate sex.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
Randomize
