If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago
so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Is there a polite/non-lush way to ask how alcohol ranks on their list of priorities? Because like idk how to break the ice furreal.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
