You're a womanizer and a bitch.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I didnt want you guys to know I needed to puke, so I just nonchalantly did in my solo cup and threw it out the window
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I think I passed out drunk at my own jewelry party
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize
